My regrets*

So it was after the glorious As. It began.

The long nights of booze getting high and wasted, the clubbing, etc.

I guess i lost myself in the sins of the flesh.

Sigh, it turns out that even as we celebrate and party and have fun.

The people who do need us, are neglected.

I guess this is really more than a CCA after all.

I really do feel ashamed of myself. People said, but its over what. No its not.

Perhaps i should really do some soul searching to ask myself on what Bong told me today.

Enjoyment vs Responsibility?

Why do we go back?

Not because I was told to, but i want to help out.

GET SOBER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Enjoy*

Alrighttt somehow i managed to convert Kiat's file successfully...So without any furthur ado..

Presenting to you the pro DDR man!!! Mr. Kiat!!!

Oh yeah gd luck to all who are taking lit later, me included lol.

As the prozzz Ian says "Ready"

Let the fun begin =)

Angsty*

Rawrrr...

Choir workshop today was good.

But for some strange reason, i felt damn angsty when i came home. Probably because of my parents. They are so freaking restictive because of my bro in army already. Seriously. I mean like its not that i take drugs, or smoke or etc right. Also, its highly unlikely that i would get robbed or cant take care of myself, pls.

Sighh really damn sian now. Just i need to do a Kiat to help myself. Oh yeah hed freaking ownage at dance revolution, while i on the other hand, am para para pro. Watch and have a gd laugh at his uberness =). Sometimes i just need a gd laugh to feel better after taking shit.

Freak somehow i cant upload the damn video.

Ok fine fine. Use my para para video...

Yeah that brought back some fun memories alright..Hope the week gets better.

2 more days to freedom =)

Someday*

So its been fantastic day of gymming, swmming and have fun with friends =)

Visited Han's blog just now and really, i guess, sometimes we just dont get what we really want the most.

Ok taking it from me, i dont have any personal experience in this matter. But after having talked to him and sharing our worries with each other. However gay it may seem i do feel proud for him being such a gracious man and sad yet for not being able to succeed..i dunno, hope still lingers in the future..

I can look up to him for the amount of dedication he poured into his relationship and for being the few who really showed me that true love exists even though people say we re so freaking, young. People seem emo and all that shit b4, no shit i ve seen and been a sucker myself, but this is really true love.

Yeah i do really feel sad for him, perharps i ll experience this shit too in the future. Who knows. A true man a true man i ll give it to him. I really dont want to judge, i mean i side him cause hes my friend, so that gives me a bias opinion. But really, i ve nvr seen such devotion b4. Give it up for him.

This just proves the saying "Life is unfair" or Nelly Furtado's "All gd things must come to an end"

Sad lar just sad.

They say the Xmas season is where healing happens, pray it happens to him.

Me? Guess my favourite saying these days is im too old for this shit..I just cant stand the feeling of seeing my friends gettin hurt in the process.

Running away? I guess i have valid reasons to, after a long Fuc*ed up history. Xmas Xmas come faster and let me sing........

Thank you for the music.
The songs I m singing.
Thanks for all the joy we re bringing.
Who can live without it?

So i say thank you for the music for giving it to me.

YOWZA!!!

ITS OVERRRRR!!!!!!!!!! WOOHOO SWEE AH!!!!

then again still have lit on 26th haiz.

Oh man the feeling of ending As is just so great. Soon its gonna be loads of fun, partying and gymming, etc,etc.

Today was kinda weird, the econs case studies were just damn like ok. Dunno whether i can ace or not. Oh well whats done is done yeah!!

Anyway went with Yanni Tiny and Chris to look at potential prom clothes. Seriously, it was like miles of non stop walking lol. I find that girls have a wider range of fashion and mixing and matching for them is complicated. But who says guys where any easier?? I guess it wouldn't be lar casue the suits and the button shirts in them are so hard to mix, worse my jacket is some weird blue black green thing. OH MY SUN!!! Basketttttt!! Hahah we had a great time laughing at each other, ok lar basket me mostly, but still!!! Quality time with friends yeah!!

Benn reading Bong's muscleman magazine that he gave to me last Xmas, lawl, i guess body building may kinda appeal to me lar. But then again im like 171 cm thats quite freaking short?? MAYBE?????????????????????????????????????? i really really guess for Asians thats acceptable lar. But my weight is like woahhhh....Muscle mass muscle mass i hope to believe haha. Hmmm i ve also been considering working as a bouncer..maybe? Who knows man although i have height problems, but i ve been mistaken for one b4. Perharps, perharps. Arghh so many things to do after As!! Work out, maybe cause i really am a himbo, like i said man maybe..Play intensive amt of pool, have fun chill out, not to mention party!!!

So anyway todays the 16th? 17 more days to prom...

For everyday its gonna be training for me, some personal goals i hope to achieve.

1) Everyday gym around 11 lets see need a nice five circuit training.
Should be cycling machine warm up, chest, back, abs, abs wings. Yeah that should be enuff to kill me. Followed by a one hour swim in the afternoon hot sun. Swee..

2) Improve in pool skills. Get me own cue, etc.

3) Spend time in choir

4) This so should be first, strengthen my faith

5) Party hard-in celebration of friendships =)

6) Die die attend carrolling

7) Clean up my past mistakes and strengthen some friendships too.

Heres a toast to the upcoming end of A levels and to a great time before 25 Jan =)

Care for a dance?

I see yourrr truee coloursssss*

Dejavu thats what happened to me today.

Had breakfast with my pal Han and had a long talk about after As and other relevant stuff.

After that went for the wake. It was really sad, though i did not know Mdm very well. I am so grateful for what the parents* of the choir family have done for the generations that learned under their legacy. I guess a part of me was being evil, trying to devise horrid reasons why people did not turn up and why people were actually there. That part of me deserves to die honestly. People have their own reasons regardless, and we must not be naive, but trusting and loving. (Read about Han's trust in www.lauhan-loong-blogspot.com) For me personally, i love this family* and so i will contribute in the least possible way i can, even if it means burning precious time. Ok im really not blaming anyone here, just that one thing someone said to me got to me. "why isnt everyone here?"

I guess thats life isnt it? People would always choose their owns paths eventually, God bless them whatever paths they have chosen, but when the call is made, how many would return? Once again, individual decision has no fault, its just reality check, how many people would die for their country as an example? How many? I can tell u this for sure, not everyone. So dont be naive, its reality, painful and angry as i feel, it is Not Right for Me to feel this way. Simply because, i am the master of no one but myself. Why is it we have crime and political backstabbings in business and even in the area of school teaching? Why is it such bad stuff exist? Satan? Must be...But i dunno...Just hold steadfast to what u believe and be true to yourself, whatever decisions we make, is our own choice, our own consequences to enjoy* in the future.

Dont mind me, im just merely commenting on the possible/potential existence of splinters in other people's eye when i have a gigantic tree trunk in my own.

Sigh life's just not perfect isnt it? No ones perfect, but i really do try to see the gd side of people and not the bad, however in some cases seriously KNN. Its just so freaking blatant, dont mind me, just that one of my best friends got played. So why would anyone choose to play somebody?
Is it the evil that lurks inside them? The thrill of it or what? Or is it mistaken identity of love that i so cannot see? Perharps, i ve nvr tasted the sweet necter of it before. So freaking pissed off now....Do whats right do whats right do whats right...so easy to talk so hard to do...why would anyone try to play someone?

Im not afraid, all players out there who hate me? Just bring it. Or if it discomforts you reading this, u ve come to the wrong blog, and can just bugger off.

I think after today, really. I see ur/people's true colours, thats apt. Reality is not pretty, its tough and hard, but all in all, believe in urself and ur own core values. Be mature about all situations and fight the good fight in life.

Maybe we should all do what the powerpuff girls sing*

"Love love love love love love love love love makes the world go round"

But in conclusion "You reap what you sow"